We're Making Plans And Doing 'Friendship' All Wrong In America

People are fucking flaky. Or at least hesitant — for one reason or another — to follow through. Myself included.

While questioning my social life outside of my girlfriend and fleeting day-to-day encounters with strangers and acquaintances, I decided to attempt to rekindle friendships with people I’ve fallen out of touch with.

Two times I made plans that needed to be confirmed — by the other person — the night before. Both times, there was radio silence from them.

I wrote that one year ago.

Turns out I was trying to make plans and maintain friendships the American way. Which is clearly the wrong—or, at least, most cumbersome and frustrating—way. But I’m American. And I live in America. So, what was I supposed to do?

You can’t bend a culture to your will or desires.

There are certain things the prevailing American lifestyle, attitude and built environments simply don’t allow for. There’s the physical component that doesn’t and probably can’t exist the way it does in Europe. And there’s the social component that’s as clumsy and misguided as using cars as our primary mode of transportation.

One reason why we plan to move is because we crave a different social environment.

Let’s define exactly what this means.