Never Retire: The Anxiety of Thinking Too Far Ahead

How midlife clarity comes not from big goals, but from daily actions that actually work.

I have always been what Americans call a planner. But there’s a difference between being well-organized and obsessing over long-term goals and events you can’t immediately control. Big life events. Distant goals. Things you can’t do much about until their time comes, except ensure that when their time comes, you are ready.

As I approached 50—and it became easier to obsess over things like longevity, mortality, and what’s next—I made a conscious shift. Because the more I fixate on long-term timelines, the more anxious and distracted I get. I’ve learned to trust structure—not grand plans or future projections.

---

What Happens When You Think Too Far Ahead

That doesn’t mean I’ve stopped thinking long-term. It just means that focusing too much on the goal—worrying about if and when you’ll get there—can make me spiral.

And when I spiral, I lose focus.

Maybe you can relate?

Worry stops you. You do nothing. Then beat yourself up for doing nothing. And now you’re even further from the thing you were worried about to begin with.

What works better—at least for me—is setting the goal, then breaking it down into tiny pieces:

• What do I need to do today?

• What do I need to check in on this week?

• What can wait until next month?

If I stay on top of those, the goal almost takes care of itself.

The devil isn’t in the details. The details are taking back the power anxiety takes from you.

For example—

---

Spain Wasn’t a Goal. It Was a Series of Small Tasks.

Obviously, my wife and I were obsessed with moving to Spain. But we funneled that energy into doing what had to be done—bit by bit:

• Saving money

• Handling paperwork

• Transitioning out of LA

• Learning how systems work in Spain

• Developing a strong sense of and imagining how life might feel day to day

We couldn’t control being in Spain yet. But we could control those tasks. And they were what made the move possible—and successful.

Same goes for Friki de Bici. Or my wife’s ceramics practice. We’re both slowly building something bigger by just showing up most days and getting the next thing done—calmly, cleanly, as best we can. And letting the outcome take shape on its own time.

---

The Never Retire Way Actually Works

It took me until my 40s to figure a lot of this out:

• Routines only work if they help you do a little bit every day. Not all day. Not perfectly. Just consistently.

• You need to be realistic. I’m the king of wanting a restaurant to be good because I hyped it up in my head, then ignoring the obvious flaws until my wife calls them out. Life works the same way. Romanticization is the death knell of once-righteous dreams and goals.

• My life isn’t a startup. I don’t need productivity porn or to make my bed every morning. (Thanks again to my wife for that one.)

• Living to 100 isn’t a mindset. It’s not about pushing yourself harder. It’s about pacing. Like skipping a yoga pose when you know your body needs a break—even when you don’t want to.

It’s not about optimizing everything. It’s about building a life you don’t want to escape from.

---

This Isn’t Advice. It’s Just Structure.

It’s not about having all the answers. It’s about having something to live inside.

A rhythm that holds.

A structure you can return to.

A system you don’t have to recover from every time life shifts.

If this landed, stick around.
I write Never Retire multiple times a week about building a structure that doesn’t burn you out.
No grind. Just rhythm, money, and movement that actually works.

Subscribe below—25% off for your first year, or €90 / $100 for lifetime access.

Because the point was never to control the future. That makes me anxious.

The point is to give today a shape that actually works. That gives me control.

Valencia’s Old City